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    Flyer
    Profile | Posts | Pics | Friends

    My Posts

    For all users. This page is automatically generated and contains the most recent and best work on the message board.

    Post Statistics:

    * Note: Current rankings are based on activity in the last calendar year.

    Recent Topics:

    It's like we totally speak different languages....

    by Flyer
    2019-05-23 11:08:25

    >> View Responses

     

    A bit of political relief for those who need it.

    by Flyer
    2019-04-25 09:26:32

    >> View Responses

     

    Public Service Announcement

    by Flyer
    2019-04-18 13:44:00

    >> View Responses

     

    And the comedy rolls on

    by Flyer
    2019-04-17 15:44:27

    >> View Responses

     

    Sfork: Forewarned is forarmed!

    by Flyer
    2019-04-11 06:49:23

    >> View Responses

     

    Be cautious of mysterious challenges

    by Flyer
    2019-04-10 16:04:54

    >> View Responses

     

    Some things never change. The beauty still astounds me!

    by Flyer
    2019-04-05 08:47:44

    A man asked his wife what she'd like for her 40th birthday. "I'd love to be six again," she replied.

    On the morning of her birthday, he got her up bright and early and off they went to a local theme park.

    What a day! He put her on every ride in the park: the Death Slide, the Screaming Loop, the Wall of Fear, everything there was! Wow!

    Five hours later she staggered out of the theme park, her head reeling and her stomach upside down. Right to a McDonald's they went, where her husband ordered her a Happy Meal along with extra fries and a refreshing chocolate shake.

    Then, it was off to a movie - the latest Disney and what a fabulous adventure!

    Finally, she wobbled home with her husband and collapsed into bed.

    He leaned over and lovingly asked, "Well, dear, what was it like being six again?" One eye opened.

    She replied, "You idiot, I meant my dress size."

    Moral of the story : Even if the man pays full attention to what a woman says, he would still get it wrong.

    >> View Responses

     

    Warning: Please move on if you are offended by lame humor.

    by Flyer
    2019-03-21 14:19:52

    Better Half, they say??????


    >> View Responses

     

    For those who pan my humor do us both a favor and skip over this post.

    by Flyer
    2019-03-15 06:44:45

    >> View Responses

     

    I will boldly make my prediction for tonight.

    by Flyer
    2019-03-14 14:58:25

    I will be bleary eyed tomorrow due to the idiotic schedule of the tournament games.

    >> View Responses

     

    Public Service Announcement

    by Flyer
    2019-03-07 12:43:15

    Broncos should target Weddle

    Article

    >> View Responses

     

    With apologies to the sensitive folks. The graphic can't be edited (at least by me)

    by Flyer
    2019-03-07 07:00:21

    >> View Responses

     

    Chicken or egg question

    by Flyer
    2019-02-21 11:18:46

    Who do you lay most of the responsibility to in last night'S game, Washington's defense or Utah's offense?

    >> View Responses

     

    One dimensional teams are always vulnerable.

    by Flyer
    2019-02-21 06:19:40

    Without any hint of an inside game this edition of the Utes is doomed.

    Washington, once again, proved all that needs to be done to defeat the Utes is defend the arc. If any future opponent down't take a hint for this game they are simply stupid.

    >> View Responses

     

    Fence for sale (some assembly required) - for those adverse toward long jokes

    by Flyer
    2019-02-14 14:18:26

    >> View Responses

     

    Happy Valentines Day keep smiling

    by Flyer
    2019-02-13 15:58:38

    An Alabama pastor said to his congregation, "Someone in this congregation has spread a rumour that I belong to the Ku Klux Klan.

    This is a horrible lie and one which a Christian community cannot tolerate. I am embarrassed and do not intend to accept this.

    Now, I want the party who said this to stand and ask forgiveness from God and this Christian family."

    No one moved. The preacher continued, "Do you have the nerve to face me and admit this is a falsehood? Remember, you will be forgiven and in your heart you will feel glory. Now stand and confess your transgression."

    Again, all was quiet. Then, slowly, a drop-dead gorgeous blonde with a body that would stop a runaway train rose from the third pew. Her head was bowed and her voice quivered as she spoke, "Reverend there has been a terrible misunderstanding. I never said you were a member of the Ku Klux Klan. I simply told a couple of my friends that you were a wizard under the sheets."

    The preacher fell to his knees, his wife fainted, and the congregation roared

    >> View Responses

     

    Them words are cheap....

    by Flyer
    2019-02-05 11:27:18

    A young man with his pants hanging half off his rear, two gold front teeth, and a half inch thick gold chain around his neck, walked into the local welfare office to pick up his check.

    He marched up to the counter and said, "Hi. You know, I just HATE drawing welfare. I'd really rather have a job. I don't like taking advantage of the system, getting something for nothing."

    The social worker behind the counter said "Your timing is excellent. We just got a job opening from a very wealthy old man who wants a chauffeur and bodyguard for his beautiful daughter. You'll have to drive around in his 2019 Mercedes-Benz GT, and he will supply all of your clothes."

    "Because of the long hours, meals will be provided. You'll also be expected to escort the daughter on her overseas holiday trips. This is rather awkward to say, but you will also have, as part of your job, the assignment to satisfy her sexual urges as the daughter is in her mid-20's and has a rather strong sex drive."

    The guy, just plain wide-eyed, said, "You're bull-shittin' me!"
    The social worker said, "Yeah, well . . . You started it .

    >> View Responses

     

    Not all races are won by the swift.

    by Flyer
    2019-02-05 08:44:22

    >> View Responses

     

    I know you've been wondering but sometimes it helps to know why.

    by Flyer
    2019-02-05 07:26:37

    >> View Responses

     

    Smart kids

    by Flyer
    2019-01-30 07:39:18

    A first-grade teacher, Ms Brooks, was having trouble with one of her more precocious students.

    The teacher asked, 'Harry, what exactly is your problem?'

    Harry answered, 'I'm too smart for the 1st grade. My sister is in the 3rd grade and I'm smarter than she is! I think I should be in the 3rd grade too!'

    Ms.Brooks finally had enough. She took Harry to the principal's office. While Harry waited in the outer office, the teacher explained the situation to the principal. The principal told Ms. Brooks he would give the boy a test. If he failed to answer any of his questions he was to go back to the 1st grade and behave. She agreed. Harry was brought in and the conditions were explained to him and he happily agreed to take the test.

    Principal: 'What is 3 x 3?'
    Harry: '9..'

    Principal: 'What is 6 x 6?'
    Harry: '36.'

    And so it went with every question to which the principal thought a bright 3rd grader ought to know the answer.

    Running out of questions to ask, the principal looks at Ms. Brooks and tells her, 'Y'know I reckon Harry can go to the 3rd grade'

    But Ms. Brooks is still skeptical of the little trouble maker and says to the principal, 'Not so fast, let me ask him a few questions..'

    The principal and Harry both agree.

    Ms Brooks asks, 'What does a cow have four of that I have only two of?'

    Harry, after a moment: 'Legs.....'

    Ms Brooks: 'What is in your pants that you have but I do not have?'

    The principal wondered why would she ask such a question! To the Principal's great relief Harry replied: 'Pockets!'

    Ms. Brooks: 'What does a dog do that a man steps into?'
    Harry: 'Pants.'

    By now, the principal is sitting forward with his mouth hanging open..

    Ms.. Brooks: 'What goes in hard and pink then comes out soft and sticky?'

    Now the principal's eyes open really wide and before he could intervene,

    Harry replied,'Bubble gum.'

    Ms. Brooks: 'What does a man do standing up, a woman does sitting down and a dog does on three legs?'
    Harry: 'Shake hands.'

    The principal is now trembling with apprehension as Ms. Brooks asks the last question..

    Ms. Brooks: 'What word starts with an 'F' and ends in 'K' and indicates a great deal of heat and excitement?'

    Harry: 'Firetruck.'

    The principal breaths a huge sigh of relief and tells the teacher,

    " Put the little bastard in 5th-Grade, I got the last six questions wrong myself..."


    And you should be ashamed of your dirty mind!

    >> View Responses

     

    Ok, so you didn't ask but I posted it anyway. Hope it helps just one person somewhere in the universe.

    by Flyer
    2019-01-29 16:19:17

    >> View Responses

     

    Be careful this winter, very very careful!!!!!!!!!

    by Flyer
    2019-01-23 13:06:05

    >> View Responses

     

    Didn't like the last one so much?

    by Flyer
    2019-01-22 12:27:36

    <An American soldier, serving in World War II, had just returned from several weeks of intense action on the German front lines.
    He had finally been granted R&R and was on a train bound for London.

    The train was very crowded, so the soldier walked the length of the train, looking for an empty seat. The only unoccupied seat was directly adjacent to a well dressed middle aged lady and was being used by her little dog.

    The war weary soldier asked, "Please, ma'am, may I sit in that seat?"

    The English woman looked down her nose at the soldier, sniffed and said, "You Americans. You are such a rude class of people. Can't you see my Little Fifi is using that seat?"

    The soldier walked away, determined to find a place to rest, but after another trip down to the end of the train, found himself again facing the woman with the dog.

    Again he asked, "Please, lady. May I sit there? I'm very tired." The English woman wrinkled her nose and snorted, "You Americans! Not only are you rude, you are also arrogant."

    The soldier didn"t say anything else; he leaned over, picked up the little dog, tossed it out the window of the train and sat down in the empty seat.

    The woman shrieked and railed, and demanded that someone defend her and chastise the soldier.

    An English gentleman sitting across the aisle spoke up, "You know, sir, you Americans do seem to have a penchant for doing the wrong thing. You eat holding the fork in the wrong hand. You drive your automobiles on the wrong side of the road. And now, sir, you've thrown the wrong bitch out the window."/blockquote>

    >> View Responses

     

    Please excuse the intrusion into the continual political circle jerk.

    by Flyer
    2019-01-22 10:58:09

    >> View Responses

     

    This board needs help. Anybody got any ideas?

    by Flyer
    2019-01-19 10:09:47

    >> View Responses

     

    Public Service Announcement

    by Flyer
    2018-10-31 16:00:50

    >> View Responses

     

    Happy Halloweeeie and happy, happy basketball eve! Go Utes!

    by Flyer
    2018-10-31 06:57:14

    >> View Responses

     

    A touch of humor to lift your Monday.

    by Flyer
    2018-10-22 06:55:06

    >> View Responses

     

    I couldn't say it better:

    by Flyer
    2018-10-06 23:33:08

    >> View Responses

     

    Let's make a deal??????

    by Flyer
    2018-08-15 07:53:46

    Adam saw that the animals in the Garden of Eden had a companion, and he asked God to make one for Adam, too.

    "Ok," God replied, "I can make you a perfect partner. Someone who will stand by you, satisfy you as you satisfy her, build you up as you build up her, and provide the exact compliment to you. But I will need to take one of your eyes, one of your hands, one of your ears, and one of your testicles."

    Adam thought about it for a while. Then he asked, "What can I get for a rib?"

    >> View Responses

     





    Top 10 Most Recently Posted Messages:

    It's like we totally speak different languages....
    (1 day ago, 6 stars)

    What more can I say?
    (23 days ago, 0 stars)

    Well said, I haven't watched a single minute of an NBA game for over 20 years. I am concerned that the college game is moving in that directiion as well.
    (23 days ago, 1 stars)

    A bit of political relief for those who need it.
    (29 days ago, 3 stars)

    Public Service Announcement
    (36 days ago, 0 stars)

    And the comedy rolls on
    (37 days ago, 5 stars)

    Sfork: Forewarned is forarmed!
    (43 days ago, 1 stars)

    Be cautious of mysterious challenges
    (44 days ago, 5 stars)

    Arrogant much????? I say, "I should care why?" and you jump to the conclusion that you hurt my never to be found feelings? Please!
    (48 days ago, 0 stars)

    and I should care, why?
    (49 days ago, 0 stars)

    If that one didn't ring your bell try this one?
    (49 days ago, 6 stars)

    Some things never change. The beauty still astounds me!
    (49 days ago, 3 stars)

    Well he said that he was tired of you too!
    (57 days ago, 0 stars)

    Survey
    (57 days ago, 4 stars)

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    (57 days ago, 0 stars)

    Everywhere man?
    (58 days ago, 0 stars)

    And so it begins:
    (58 days ago, 0 stars)

    He needs you for the next trial.
    (58 days ago, 0 stars)

    There is a difference between innocent and not guilty.
    (58 days ago, 1 stars)

    Define your definition of "innocent"
    (58 days ago, 0 stars)

    Which of the media outlets are you referring to?
    (61 days ago, 0 stars)

    It is another great day. The truth is an ugly thing to those who make crap up to pretend that they have the moral right to take down an elected president
    (61 days ago, 1 stars)

    A picture out of the past to help you pathetic Trump monster people
    (61 days ago, 0 stars)

    Looks to me that he really answered your question.
    (61 days ago, 0 stars)

    And one we can all relate to!
    (64 days ago, 3 stars)

    Warning: Please move on if you are offended by lame humor.
    (64 days ago, 6 stars)

    AS one who lives in Colorado I have had Howdy Doody around enough to know he is incompetent to lead anything but a bar.
    (64 days ago, 0 stars)

    For those who pan my humor do us both a favor and skip over this post.
    (70 days ago, 6 stars)

    Washington also knew the code to beat the Utes, Take away the arc and they are done, done, done. Until the Utes develop an inside game they are easy to defend with any decent athlete.
    (70 days ago, 1 stars)

    It's really not that difficult. Try to keep up> Or do you just want to keep telling me that you are pissed at me?
    (71 days ago, 0 stars)

    I will boldly make my prediction for tonight.
    (71 days ago, 2 stars)

    oh, and hell yes I let the kid in.
    (71 days ago, 0 stars)

    Mastermind? Maybe misterlostmind.
    (71 days ago, 1 stars)

    I bribed two different colleges my kids went to. Oh wait... That was called “tuition.
    (71 days ago, 3 stars)

    Rumors are that he is going to be released
    (78 days ago, 0 stars)

    Public Service Announcement
    (78 days ago, 0 stars)

    Unfun indeed. I think I will stop trying to give people a chuckle or two. Not worth the grief.
    (78 days ago, 0 stars)

    Why not just ignore me and my posts. It will frustrate you less.
    (78 days ago, 2 stars)

    And yet, you have posted how many?
    (78 days ago, 0 stars)

    With apologies to the sensitive folks. The graphic can't be edited (at least by me)
    (78 days ago, 2 stars)

    And the UN certainly doesn't give a flip about our interests.
    (85 days ago, 0 stars)

    What do you not understand about negotiations? The harder the problem, the more distance between the two parties the longer it takes and the stronger negotiation position each party tries to establish.
    (85 days ago, 0 stars)

    uh, is one million and two too much?
    (85 days ago, 0 stars)

    Naw, don't bust his balloon.
    (85 days ago, 0 stars)

    Tulsi and MSNBC are full of ________!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
    (85 days ago, 0 stars)

    Chicken or egg question
    (92 days ago, 0 stars)

    or offense.
    (92 days ago, 0 stars)

    Absolutely agree that he would have been a factor. My concern is a bit deeper. I don't see a urgency to develop a underneath presence with the team.
    (92 days ago, 0 stars)

    One dimensional teams are always vulnerable.
    (92 days ago, 1 stars)

    I hereby submit my resume
    (93 days ago, 1 stars)

    Fence for sale (some assembly required) - for those adverse toward long jokes
    (99 days ago, 2 stars)

    Happy Valentines Day keep smiling
    (100 days ago, 5 stars)

    But....is there enough room for your head?
    (107 days ago, 0 stars)

    The only thing that is racist is your reading and interpretation, sir. There is nothing in the story that refers to a race. As a matter of fact it could apply to most.
    (107 days ago, 2 stars)

    I pity you if that disturbs you!
    (108 days ago, 2 stars)

    Crappy joke, yes. Political, no way by any stretch!
    (108 days ago, 1 stars)

    That is funny, how?
    (108 days ago, 0 stars)

    I would greatly appreciate your kindness in keeping the political crap out of the humor posts.
    (108 days ago, 1 stars)

    Them words are cheap....
    (108 days ago, 5 stars)

    Not all races are won by the swift.
    (108 days ago, 2 stars)

    I know you've been wondering but sometimes it helps to know why.
    (108 days ago, 5 stars)

    It's a heavy cross to carry.
    (114 days ago, 0 stars)

    I've never had one of those "mutual" feelings. Does it hurt?
    (114 days ago, 0 stars)

    I don't care
    (114 days ago, 1 stars)

    Smart kids
    (114 days ago, 6 stars)

    No, I didn't come up with that but I kinda like to tune. Maybe I'll give it an effort?
    (114 days ago, 0 stars)

    Ok, so you didn't ask but I posted it anyway. Hope it helps just one person somewhere in the universe.
    (115 days ago, 5 stars)

    Be careful this winter, very very careful!!!!!!!!!
    (121 days ago, 2 stars)

    Didn't like the last one so much?
    (122 days ago, 11 stars)

    Please excuse the intrusion into the continual political circle jerk.
    (122 days ago, 7 stars)

    hip hip hooray
    (124 days ago, 0 stars)

    I guessed as much, I jest. We can call each other names and deride politicians all day but don't dare use a swear word, it have cause horrific problems
    (124 days ago, 0 stars)

    And besides, I thought I clearly spelled the word out but when it showed up it was changed how can I trust what I say will show up as I said it?
    (124 days ago, 0 stars)

    Because I know Ain't $#!+ and his brother Jack, that is why.
    (124 days ago, 0 stars)

    In fairness, maybe others like me just don't frequent the board enough to see the rare non-political post so we didn't see it. Before all of you gripe about my thought, I know very well that I can avoid the political category but that is not the
    (124 days ago, 0 stars)

    No sweat pal
    (125 days ago, 0 stars)

    A bit testy today?
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    That would be a tad difficult since she is not alive anymore. Nice try though.
    (125 days ago, 0 stars)

    to each his own....
    (125 days ago, 0 stars)

    This board needs help. Anybody got any ideas?
    (125 days ago, 2 stars)

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    (125 days ago, 1 stars)

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    (135 days ago, 0 stars)

    and that Santa Clause is real?
    (136 days ago, 1 stars)

    If I'm a Dude then you are a fatso. Time will tell, time will tell
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    A referendum against Trump you say? Not so quick there my friends.
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    Public Service Announcement
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    Viva UteFans!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
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