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The company had cost plus contracts so they wouldn't let us fire anyone unless there was bullet-proof documentation.

Posted By: pangloss
Date: Thursday, January 10, 2019 at 04:09 pm

I had another dope working for me at the rocket ranch. I couldn't pawn him off on anyone. He was a real idiot. He actually parked in the far end of the parking lot to save money on gas.

Anyway, I had been torturing him for 6 months or so, documenting every thing in hopes of firing his ass. We got a huge RFP (proposal) to work. I was the book boss on the cost volumes. I put my idiot on travel, the least risky and most insulting assignment. There was over 100 folks working on the proposal. We worked about 10 months on the proposal & spent several million putting it together.

The day after we turned it into the print shop, my idiot gave me two weeks notice. I asked him if he had another job. And, sure enough, he did, with Thiokol, our only competitor on the giant program. I called security and two security guys marched my idiot off to HR. They made him sit in a conference room alone. After a couple hours they marched him back to his cubicle to clean it out. They wouldn't let him log into his computer. Then they marched him back to the HR conference room. They yelled at him about intellectual property, and theft, and threatened him and his offspring with doom if he told Thiokol anything, especially how much our bids were (it was over a $billion just to calibrate). He was crying by the time they threw him out and told him to get the hell off the company's property.

The $#!+ hit the fan up the org chart. The division president was convinced my idiot gave away our proposal secrets. No one believed me when I assured them he was an idiot and only had access to travel estimates. The division president was so upset he had chest pains and they hauled him off to the hospital. He survived.

We won the program.

<<Ignore pangloss ] [PritnerPrint This Message ] >>

Messages In This Thread


o NEW: I just bought three of my colleagues "get better soon" cards. Ain't nothin wrong with em I just think they could do better. (nm)
FlyfishingUte - -- Thursday 10 January 2019, at 12:21 pm [ID# 1936137] [reply]
(9)
The Thrill icon NEW: If you start doing that, get ready to buy several billion cards. (nm)
The Thrill - Top 25 Poster -- Thursday 10 January 2019, at 12:26 pm [ID# 1936140] [reply]
o NEW: why would I buy several billion cards? i don't have that many colleagues (nm)
FlyfishingUte - -- Thursday 10 January 2019, at 12:41 pm [ID# 1936143] [reply]
The Thrill icon NEW: It was to imply everybody but the moment has passed and my joke was poorly thought out. Carry on (nm)
The Thrill - Top 25 Poster -- Thursday 10 January 2019, at 05:39 pm [ID# 1936175] [reply]
pangloss icon NEW: Brilliant. I wish I had thought of that when I had a couple lazy deadbeats reporting to me. Swearing, yelling and humiliation was ineffective. (nm)
pangloss - -- Thursday 10 January 2019, at 01:07 pm [ID# 1936148] [reply]
(1)
Newbomb Turk icon NEW: Swearing, yelling and humiliation don't sway us at all. (nm)
Newbomb Turk - Top 25 Poster -- Thursday 10 January 2019, at 01:44 pm [ID# 1936153] [reply]
pangloss icon NEW: One of my guys ...
pangloss - -- Thursday 10 January 2019, at 02:34 pm [ID# 1936157] [reply]
(1)
o NEW: And that is why we can’t have nice briefcases. (nm)
ExquisUte - -- Thursday 10 January 2019, at 02:36 pm [ID# 1936158] [reply]
(3)
Sprinkles the Bear icon NEW: Sounds like it's time for some Glengarry Glenross motivation. Third place is you're fired. (nm)
Sprinkles the Bear - -- Thursday 10 January 2019, at 02:42 pm [ID# 1936159] [reply]
(1)
pangloss icon NEW: The company had cost plus contracts so they wouldn't let us fire anyone unless there was bullet-proof documentation.
pangloss - -- Thursday 10 January 2019, at 04:09 pm [ID# 1936167] [reply]
(2)
Newbomb Turk icon NEW: Titan? (nm)
Newbomb Turk - Top 25 Poster -- Thursday 10 January 2019, at 04:14 pm [ID# 1936171] [reply]
pangloss icon NEW: Yup. It was Ernie with the chest pains. (nm)
pangloss - -- Thursday 10 January 2019, at 04:22 pm [ID# 1936172] [reply]
Newbomb Turk icon NEW: There was no handle he couldn't fly off of..... (nm)
Newbomb Turk - Top 25 Poster -- Thursday 10 January 2019, at 04:40 pm [ID# 1936173] [reply]
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