Caffeine Free Diet Coke now presents, real men of genius

Posted By: ironman1315
Date: Friday 10 August 2018, at 11:56 pm
Recommended by 7 user(s)

(real men of genius)

Today we salute you, Mr. Rice Eccles Ute Fan Story Inventor.

(Mr. Rice Eccles Ute Fan Story Inventor)

Using nothing but your keyboard and faux outrage, you're following the American dream, getting mob riled up on the internet with nothing but a troll-like grin and some fake news.

(Go make $#!+ UUUUUUUUUP!)

Sure, there are no pictures and no corroborating evidence. But you gotta tell how some figment of your imagination peed on your kid.

(Oh that's gross!)

Your keen storytelling skills will serve you well as you get the BYU faithful riled up. instincts tell you to stick to activities that involve lots of bouncing and jiggling. And if that doesn't work, say it was actually your fake brother's kid.

(They're from Canada!)

So crack open an ice-cold caffeine free Diet Coke, story guy, because we all know, that someday you can live down the fact you tried to beat up a cheerleader and lost.

(Mr. Rice Eccles Ute Fan Story Inventor)
Copyright (C) 1998-2019 Utefans LC. All rights reserved. Partner of USA TODAY Sports Digital Properties